For lack of anything better-update time…..

I wracked my brain trying to think of something to talk about, which usually comes very easily to me as I do seem to have an opinion on almost everything….when asked for it or not J

But there is no one particular topic that I’m super passionate about or have been for the last couple weeks. I've been distracted and sick so I guess I’ll just do the cop out and “update” everyone on what’s been going on.

So,let me think-what has been going on that’s worth updating since I started my blog a few months ago. Well let’s see-I did end up talking to Crypto once or twice after the whole big bust up in January. As usual you go through the “well maybe I misunderstood or had no reason to get quite so mad…” but as it turned out, No I did not misunderstand, and yes I had every reason to get mad. That boy is a useless waste of skin. That’s all the time I’m willing to waste talking about that.

Guitar lessons came to an end last week….Much to my utter dismay, I do not seem to be able to master the guitar with absolutely no practice at all…..Imagination that…which is too bad, because I did really enjoy it. But to be honest- I was horrible at it. It was likely due to the lack of practice as well as the inability to master rhythm or a beat of any kind. Guitar Hero sure tried his best, but I just couldn't do my fair share. Which led to stress (being a type A personality trying to learn something is not easy) and then self-criticism and a lot of self-doubt. Since it was supposed to be a fun little hobby, I decided to take a little break. Luckily guitar hero said I could come back whenever I wanted to try again. He really is a cool dude! I’m glad I met him and hope we can somehow stay in touch.

I still love summer-I’m just disappointed as all hell that I didn't seem to get one. I waited soooo long for the sun to peek over the clouds and the snow to disappear off the ground so I could wear my pretty dresses and sandals and suntan. 2 months later, it’s raining, soggy, wet, and cold and I’m still as pale as Casper. I tried wearing a dress a few times regardless, but the hurricane like wind took care of that little wish-I’m sorry, I do not wish to advertise my underpants to the world.

I think we had that one super hot week at the beginning of July, when I was on holidays. Which would have been nice, had I actually gone anywhere. Instead, my mother and I were essentially trapped in my little sauna of an apartment, trying not to go Lord of the Flies on each other.

I've also been super sick off and on since January. Likely due to lack of quality nutrition in my diet as opposed to the “open bag, insert food in mouth” eating plan I was on. I had a wicked sinus infection in February and I’m now just recovering from an 18 day stretch of something that seems to be mutant strep throat. I will definitely have to improve things.

Volunteering is still going well. Not only do I get to go schmooze kitties and love them, but I’m also getting my first batch of “foster babies” on Friday. Little kittens that are too small to go up for adoption right now. I’m so excited I could just pee myself……(uh, I wouldn't though)

I guess the “biggest” and most welcome change has been boyfriend. (I told you I was distracted) Anyone who has read Outlander and fallen in love with Jamie Fraser will know what I mean when I say I found my Jamie. It has been an interesting adjustment for me to make, to be honest, to have someone around who obviously cares about you, and you sit there and scratch your head and wonder why? I guess that’s the downside of low self-esteem. It must be annoying for him to constantly reassure me, but I’m doing my best and getting there slowly. I’m just thankful the man has infinite patience and kindness with me.

All I know is that my heart has suffered some awful blows the past 10 years and as a result, I closed it off and shut it down. My Jamie has made it beat again.

Note dear reader: this does not mean I live in fairy tale land and that there aren't going to be any fights or discussions or disappointments at times. I’m sure that there are things about me that drive him batty or annoy him, just as things about him do me.

But generally speaking-I found a good man and I hope he realizes that my sarcastic bluntness is part of my defensive system , and has always been my way of protecting myself from vulnerability and heartbreak.

So I think that’s pretty much it-I have nothing to complain about because I think for the first time in a long time I’m balanced out. Good job, good friends and family, and a good man.

So when I feel like writing again I will….

Ciao for now J

I am a very lucky gal :)